Art Imitating Life: LIFE ACCORDING TO HER

By Adesuwa Iluobe

She felt herself humming to her alarm tone...it wasn't the shrill kind of jump-off-your-bed alarm tone, it was "mighty to save" by Michael W. Smith a gospel artist, singing passionately.."Savour HE can move the mountains..." no better way to start the morning. Groaning she rolled over to the edge of her bed and tiredly hit the dismiss option on her phone...it was 4.45am, she still had 15minutes to prayer time and she drifted off to more sleep.

Like she was jolted she sat up! Snatched up her phone...5.10am! Whoa!!...she grabbed her Bible and rosary and ran to the sitting room..she was late of course, family prayers started at 5am.

8.00..She stood at the bustop, frantically checking her watching every 10 seconds...work resumes 8.30am, shouldn't she have just left at 7.00am? No, the bed was too inviting even after morning prayers at 6am and even if she was running late at 7.30am she spared enough time to treat herself to a plate of dodo and fried egg..."Man shall not live by work alone but by every meal that giveth strength" she muttered to herself.

8.10am! Still no taxi going towards secretariat, she rummaged through her bag and found her phone.."Goodmorning Sir, I am sorry I would be some minutes late to work today, there is a lot of traffic on ..." She hurriedly typed a text to her boss and copied her colleague. Just then...

"Secretariat! Sece...!" One of the NURTW council officials bellowed...

She hit "send" and threw her phone in her bag and manoveured her small body past two men and into the car she went.

"Phew!" She breath out. 8.15am.

8.40am. "Goodmorning!" She greeted the security personnels at the gate of her office...as she neared her office, she observed with glee that her boss was yet to arrive "yipee! I got here before you regardless!..me and my morning karate moves" and dramatically wiped her brow and skipped to her office.

12pm. Her boss had instructed her to make some enquiries from one of the ministries..."Goodmorning Sir, please I want to make enquiries about ..." She kept explaining and she could feel her hand itching, it really wanted to hit the officer she was talking to who wasn't listening but staring at her chest.

He drooled for some seconds, stripping her with his eyes.. then "go and sit down and wait! We go call you"

She obeyed.

12.30am she pinged Zainab her colleague "am yet to see the secretary o! I dey wait"

Zainab - "did you tell them on whose behalf your there?"

She was taken aback- "why? "

Zainab - *laugh smiley* Sade abeg no tear my belle with laugh. Tell them who you are representing joor!

She squirmed on her seat. Then got up and went to the the officer. "Sir, I am here on behalf of Mr Ikiere.."

"Eh!" He snapped his head up. "Why you no talk since naw? Oya follow me"

1.00pm enquiries made and she was out of the ministry.

She pinged Zainab -"wow that worked!"

Zainab- "naija for show!"

1.45pm the day was going well so far, she had gone to the Institute to follow up on some files. She was deeply into he phone as she walked along the hall way leading to the customer care unit..."Sade!"

"One of these days I would slap somebody for shocking me!" She screamed inwardly. Then turning around she plastered a plastic smile on her face and looked up..."Hey Chijioke" of course only him had that voice...

"How are you doing..you look good!" He gushed

She looked around her for support "oh thank you. How are you?"

"I am fine..how is work?" He replied

She knew it! Typical greetings! "Fine and yours?"...did she really date this guy at one time. They exchanged more pleasantries and parted.

She kept thinking...all these years with foolish unyielding relationships! "Arrrrghhhhh" she mouthed not making sound.

As she settled in the library, she appeared to work diligently, but even as she indeed worked, her mind was faraway, she had gone back to the University and was sifting through her exs, cussing and regreting at the same time...all the time wasted!the insincerity, lies! deception... The she came back to her present state, nearing 30 no relationship! And she was yet to be rich too! Didn't she say she would retire at 35?...who did she offend?

3.30pm she was finally done with the files and heaved a sigh of relief. She was tired. Not from work, she enjoyed her job, but from her thoughts. She looked down at her diary, this time with focus and saw all the things she had jotted. Wow! Even when faraway she still managed to make sense, her boss would be pleased.

5.30pm...She was almost running out of the office...work closes at 5pm, she had added some minutes to shed some weight off tomorrow's to-dos. She had ditched her heely shoes for flat sandals and was so happy and free she felt  could fly.

As she settled in a taxi, she thought to herself how much of a routine her life was becoming and amazed at how she remained effective through all the aches, worries, excitement that weighed on her mind. She looked out the window and saw so many other Nigerians, and wondered if they also made "karate moves" to their offices.

She just heaved and concluded that Life was a struggle, what makes us larger than life is that we wade through all life throws at us and still live. Life is the smaller one, it just throws dices..only!

N.B- 'Hehehehehe! Hello people! Todays's AIL is for all of us...Life isn't according to Sade alone! Please feel free to share yours! Gracias!